THE TALKS INITIAL DOUBTS************************ Devotee.—You say one can realize the Self by a search for it. What is the character of this search? Maharshi.—You are the mind or think that you are the mind. The mind is nothing but thoughts. Now behind every particular thought there is a general thought which is the “I”, that is yourself. Let as call this “I” the first thought. Stick to this I-thought & question it to find out what it is. Wnen this question take strong hold on you, you cannot think of other thoughts. D.—When I do like this & cling to my self, i.e., the I-thoughts do came but I say to myself ‘Who am I?’ & there is no answer forthcoming. To be in this condition is the sadhana. Is it so? M.—This is a mistake that people often make. What happens when you make a serious quest for the Self is that the I-thought as a thought disappears, something else from the depths takes hold of you & that is not the ‘T’ which commenced the quest. D. What is this something else? M.—That is the real Self, the import of I. It is not the ego. It is the Supreme Being itself. THE SAD-GURU D.—You have elsewhere stated that without the Grace of the Sad-guru one cannot get at the Self. What precisely do you mean by this? What is this Guru? M. From the standpoimt of the path of knowledge it is the supreme state of the Self, which is the Sad-guru. It is different from the ego-self, which you call your self. D.—Then if is the supreme state of my own self, in what sense do you mean that I cannot reach it without the grace of the Sad-guru? M.—The ego-self is the jiva. It is different from the Lord of all (Sarveshwara). When through disterested devotion the jiva approaches the Lord, He graciously assumes name & form & takes the jiua into himself…. Therefore, they say the Guru in none other the Lord. He is a human embodiment of the Divine Grace: says the Gita. The real Guru himself. Who can doubt this? THE SELF WITHIN WAITS FOR YOU:- D.— You often say, ‘the whole world does not exists without you’, ‘everything depends upon you’, what is there without you?’, etc. This is really baffling. The world was there before my birth. It will be there after my death, even as it has survived the deaths of so many who once lived as I am living now. M.—Did I ever say that the world is there ‘because’ of you? But I have put to you question ‘what is there without your self? You must know that by the self the body subtle or gross, was not meant. Besides, the idea is put to you that if you once know the Self in which all the ideas move, not excluding the idea of yourself, of others like yourself & of the world, you can realize the truth that there is a Reality, a supreme Truth which is the Self of all the world you now see, the Self of all the selves, the one Real, which is the Parama Atman, the supreme Etrrnal, as distinguished from the jiva, the ego-self which is impermanent. You must not mistake the ego-self or the bodily idea for the Atman. SAMADHI, NIRVILALPA & SAHAJA—TRANCE & NATURAL:- D.—Then what is Samadhi? M.—In Yoga the term Samadhi refers to some kind of trance & there are various kinds of Samadhi. But the Samadhi I speak of is different. It is Sahaja Samadhi. For, here you have Samadhana, you remain calm & composed even while you are active; you realize that you are moved by the deeper Real Self within. You have no worries, no anxieties, no cares. For, here you come to realize that there is nothing belonging to you, the ego. And everything is done by Something with which you get into conscious union. D.—if this is Sahaja Samadhi & the most desirable condition there is no need for Nirvikalpa Samadhi? M.—The Nirvikalpa Samadhi of Raja Yoga may have its use. But in Jnana this Sahaja Sthiti or Sahaja Nashtha itself is Nirvikalpa state. For, in this state the mind is free from doubts. It has need to swing between alternatives of possibilities & probabilities. It has no vikalpa of any kind. It is sure of the Truth. It feels the presence of the Real. Even when it is sure of the Truth. It feels the presence of the Real. Even when it is active in the Reality, the Self, the Supreme being.